Day 19 – Letting Go of Negative Influences

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This topic contains 38 replies, has 27 voices, and was last updated by

 
Participant
2 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #4709

    Reply to this thread with some of the positive “inputs” that you are using to replace negative influences in your life or how you are limiting your exposure to negativity- Day 19 – Letting Go of Negative Influences. You might find some great ideas to help you as well as inspire others with your own.

  • #8258

    Participant

    I have started listening to podcasts on my phone. I listen to them in the car and when I’m on the treadmill at the gym. Mostly, the podcasts are from public radio shows-game show, social sciences, story-telling, nature, and the most important one is about spirituality and being human. I always feel hopeful and connected to the world when I listen to any of these. I more or less gave up watching the news – it is all depressing and mean-spirited.

    I’d love to have the content for 30-Day Solution available via podcast. The web site has been an amazingly helpful companion.

    • #11608

      Participant

      How do you get the podcasts?how do I get the podcasts?

      • #15093

        Participant

        Hi just google “blogs” you will find plenty of interesting and uplifting stuff.

      • #15108

        Participant

        If you haven’t listened to Tara Brach’s podcast….it’s a must! She’s into mindfulness and her podcasts/teachings go hand in hand with lesson in this book.

      • #17591

        Participant

        The app Audials is awesome to. It lets you lookup all kinds of radio programs like talk radio as well as a huge variety of podcasts.

        • #17596

          Participant

          Hi @ mark329. I just installed the app you mentioned. Thanks for the tip! Let me know your recommendations! Thanks again! Onward, Sina

  • #8347

    Thank you for sharing your technique. I would imagine many things are better than the news, and I’m glad you’ve found a way to incorporate these podcasts into your daily life. Best of luck!

    • #11609

      Participant

      How do I get the podcasts?

  • #8360

    Participant

    I’ve created a whole new night time routine. I only watch three shows/week on tv. Two of them are half hour sitcoms and one is a dramedy for an hour.
    My routine is coming home from work, turning on some music, firing up some essential oil in my diffuser, and checking my email (I want to incorporate more yoga/movement/meditation into this time period). Then I have dinner, study and read, sometimes take a relaxing bath and listen to guided meditation/sleep hypnosis. It’s a very nurturing and relaxing routine, and I love it.
    It means less time with my dh who spends all his free time in front of the tv, but it seems that the watching the 3 shows that we do share is more special than before when I was getting sucked into all the mindless tv.
    Music invigorates me and tv generally drains me. This has been a positive side-effect of sobriety!

  • #8882

    Participant

    I have pretty much given up all tv except for Dancing With The Stars ,The Voice and some sports.I gave up News and newspapers 7 years ago when I read and listened to The Secret. My next biggest challenge is staying away from or spending less time with negative ,complaining friends who choose to stay stuck where they are1 Unfortunately one is my Bff for over 26 years!!
    How do I go about doing that/ and the same with neg family?

    • #8936

      Hi @biancalana- there’s really no easy way to handle negative influences when they are close friends or family. Luckily, Dave and Jack foresaw this as an issue and it is covered in Day 27. I am confident this will help you figure out how to address these relationships. Best of luck!

  • #8885

    Participant

    Where do I find the 2 faces of envy? and the completed new story?

    • #8919
      ted

      Participant

      I don’t know, I have not located them either.

    • #8935

      Hi @bianalana and @ted, thank you for the question. Since we are still currently in beta-launch, we do not have all of the information up on the website as of yet. We are working to complete everything as soon as possible. Thank you for your patience.

  • #8891

    Participant

    I wrote the My NEW Life story and had fun doing it. It really flowed easily as I imagined all the effects of the positive changes of living 100% committed to sobriety. I have unleashed unlimited enthusiasm for life. I ask ,trust(believe) and receive, knowing I deserve the best and accept it now. I am truly grateful
    for this program, thank you Dave and Jack. I am incredible grateful for all of the abundance in my life. (Today is my 31st day in sobriety)

  • #9053

    Participant

    I just wrote a wonderful and affirming letter to the future me. That was an amazing experience. I really felt the pain when I was describing why I started this program but also feel so distant from that person already. I am so excited to see where I am when I receive that letter back in one year. So grateful!!!

    • #9563

      Participant

      Great idea jclaire!. I’ll write that letter too

    • #20665

      Participant

      I liked creating new story as well. I found the ask, receive, believe and be grateful to be very helpful in redefining my affirmations. I am familiar with Hicks and have read before, but this program has helped me incorporate it with all the other information in an easier and more productive way. Of course I have been sober for 20 days so that might be why as well!!! Have a great day everyone!!

  • #9590

    Participant

    I have never been a TV junkie but do watch more than enough news and politics. I will cut back on both and replace them with playing and/or listening to music and DVDs from the library that are uplifting and/or educational . I have also been in the habit of turning on NPR in the middle of the night if I awake and have trouble falling back to sleep. Since quitting alcohol my sleep is better so this is less of an issue but when it does happen I’ll think about my plans, dreams and vision statements.

  • #10083

    Participant

    I think I will apply the clear water solution. Make all my actions, thoughts, communications, etc, focused on the solutions that will help me achieve the peace of mind that I’m desiring. Clear and positive in= cloudy negative out.

  • #10895

    Participant

    I do a 5 minute Gratitude Meditation almost every morning. It helps get the day off to a good start. Also, when I feel like I’m not enough or doing enough to reach a certain goal, and start feeling anxious or like I’m failing, I stop and think of something I’m grateful for. Usually this small distraction is all I need to feel less anxious and get out of a slump. As often as I think of it, I constantly look for things I’m grateful for, even if they are really small.

    • #11610

      Participant

      Hey, is the Gratitude meditation a guided recording?

  • #12592

    Participant

    I really appreciated Day 19 -The Attraction Solution- the chapter really cleared up how what I want is actually what I am. And I have the power to actually do something about what I am!

    And I had a little insight into my own tendency to be a “negative Nancy” – thus attracting negativity or also pushing away positive people and opportunities. Aha!

    My “next year” looks brighter. I’m on Day 19, 38 days in, haven’t really lost weight, but I’m learning how to enjoy being sober. Every day gives me a tool that helps. The forums are really helpful, reading from everyone’s experience, so thank you all for sharing.

  • #13023

    Participant

    For positive influence I listen to sermons on line from powerful pastors all over the country. Andy Stanley, Robert Morris, Levi Lusko, Matt Chandler, Judah Smith just to name a few. TV shows with violence have always been difficult for me to watch and my husband’s favorite news channel usually leaves me feeling anxious about the future. I have a passion for books and music so I frequent my public library. Wrote the letter to my future self thriving in sobriety. Meeting with a sober friend today I haven’t had the courage to reach out to until now. My future is so bright ” I gotta wear shades”!?

  • #15109

    Participant

    I listen to podcasts (Tara Brach’s is my favorite) and books on tape via Audible. I read a few books about people who had drinking problems and made it out but there was lots of negative about drinking outcomes in the book which “attracted negative”/made me actually crave alcohol.

    I will also fill my time by writing gratitude notes to people on my list.

  • #16824

    Participant

    Thanks LovetobeActive for the Tara Brach suggestion.
    Today I realized that in addition to the crazy-making from the news, almost every single TV program or movie I choose to see is really stressful and horrific (Walking Dead, Homeland, 24, Designated Survivor, Bates Motel) – no wonder I would chug the wine while watching. I was actually stressing myself out watching these scenarios.
    Tonight I saw the movie Logan & it was 75% graphic violence. People in the theater were cheering at decapitations. After today’s readings I am more aware of these kinds of images because I want to reprogram my subconcious mind – not only for sobriety but also for chronic pain.

  • #17522

    Participant

    I’m disappointed that a year ago someone else was looking for the references from the book (envy and story example) and was given the excuse that the website was in beta and the content was being added. A year! It seems like the authors have moved on from this project to something else and left behind this partially completed skeleton. If it were not for the support being posted by other ‘students’, I probably would have given this up already do the frustrations of finding broken promises on this site. And yes, I have submitted this through the contact link and have only heard the crickets for weeks. To end on a positive note, again, my gratitude to you that post and share what works for you and the suggestions that you give. Peace.

  • #17523

    Participant

    Hi @remington22. Yes, it’s disappointing. This is primarily Dave Andrews fault IMO, Jack Canfield has partnered with promising authors to help them launch books. He lends his time, effort, and most importantly his Name. Then he returns to his own projects. Dave is squandering this opportunity and letting down a lot of folks it would appear. I’ve tried time and again to contact him on this matter
    HOWEVER, the program still stands as one of the finest, and this Companion Website still functions well enough to ensure success for those who give 100% Commitment.

    Consider posting encouragement to others yourself! It does a world of good for people to be heard and appreciated! Thanks!
    Onward, Sina

  • #19673

    Participant

    I’m having a hard time with an upcoming trip to visit family members during the holidays. 1/2 of the family shares the views of a jingoistic, anti-semitic, misogynist and I do not want to be around those attitudes, not to mention everybody drinks. In addition, my mother always has negative things to say about me, my father and most all family members How to handle this? It is very toxic for me. I get filled with dread just at the thought even though I tend to be a very positive person. I really do not want to go but my father is very insistent despite the yearly fights. Last year I did not go. I was lonely but at least there were no fights…

  • #19985

    Participant

    Fortunately, I cut out negative news and facebook and other social media about 18 months ago, not out of any intelligence on my part – I just couldn’t take it anymore. I tend to watch and read financial news, which has its own biases and reporting issues, but does tend to focus more on practical information and doesn’t really engage in rage-stoking like the more traditional news outlets. I do also listen to podcasts and audible and engage more in learning (online and through books) than keeping up with current events. I realize I need to keep up with current events to some degree, but it is difficult to do that without being sucked into the anger vortex. Like some of the others above, my family members (primarily my wife and now our 11-year old) are negative broadcasters and I am trying to find a way to not be sucked into the negativity they wallow in, but it’s difficult because they seem to enjoy bringing me into their misery and get upset when I’m not willing to go there all the time. Meditation helps. Lots and lots and lots of meditation.

  • #19987

    Participant

    I COMPLETELY understand brightpath’s post, and the other posts in this thread. It’s difficult to protect ourselves from negativity when it’s coming from family members. Reminds me of “you can’t live with them and you can’t live without them”. This method is working for me. The book and website will probably be an important part of my day for a long, long while. The support this chat site offers is amazing. Tomorrow I start my on-line French course. I took 101 a few months ago and will now start 102. My brain will be so much happier with some good learning, rather than inebriation. Have a WONDERFUL day!

    • #19990

      Participant

      Nice work taking up French katballou – although I have only about 30-45 minutes of free time a week (which has been one of the triggers for my drinking), I’ve been trying to teach myself software development. 30-45 minutes per week isn’t the best way to learn something detailed like that, but the feeling of learning something new is very positive. Et bonne chance avec le deuxième cours de français.

      • #19992

        Participant

        Merci beaucoup, brightpath! I appreciate your kind words very much! You speak French! And you even included accents! Most impressive! Have a bright & beautiful day today!

  • #20397

    Participant

    I stopped listening to regular radio stations last year sometime. I listed to an amazing all classical station in Southern California evveryday on my commute. It is funny because when you go back to a “classic rock” or “alternative” station the same songs play that I would have heard back then! You can only bare “Welcome to the Jungle” so many times. I still watch TV some time but it is usually comedy series by Netflix- so not negative. Also I make a point to have my earbuds in at work and listen to any and every free health summit or Podcasts out there; this makes it easier to not have to listen to the incessant complaints of one co-worker inparticular. There is tons of free info available to help us on this Sobriety journey. I recommend everyone finds an app to stream a Classical Music station and revisit the greats.

    • #20398

      Participant

      Hi @yogiintraining-18.
      KUSC is the ONLY radio station in Southern California!!! No commercials all Music.
      As far as Comedy, Wanda Sykes and Craig Ferguson are hilarious! Netflix/YouTube are great resources, especially if you own a Smart TV!
      Onward, Sina

  • #120218

    Participant

    I have stopped watching the news—well, not entirely, but the news right now is devastating, and left me with no hope for the future of the planet. It’s so overwhelming negative that I was regularly sobbing while watching TV.

    I avoid TV before bed and instead listen to calming CDs, and also listen to the recordings I have on my phone that I have of me reading my affirmations.

  • #120780

    Participant

    I already stopped watching the news, but it still pops up sneekily in sites I may visit. Just annoying!

    I have been doing m 30DSS religiously just before bed. Today, it was pretty powerful to see m yself a year in the future and ask for what I want. It is not political or based on the stories we get bombarded with. My wants are dreams of being a good person, healthy, a good sister, friend, and wife, feeling happy for my contributions, and knowing what I can change and what I cannot.

    I wrote in a year, “I love my life and deserve it. It is a dream come true, and I am thriving financially, spiritually, mentally, and happy…”

  • #120783

    Participant

    Hi chrise86 … I love your good post. I will keep your good words in mind. Have a great day!

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