Day 3 Forum – FAQ

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Participant
1 month ago.

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  • #1324

    TBD

  • #6355
    pgm

    Participant

    Day 3 My body is adapting. My first test was last night. Ice tea is not that bad. My senses are beginning to come back

  • #8454

    Participant

    Good for you 🙂 I just had mineral water with my burger and fries, kinda weird, not having a nice cold beer with my dinner but it wasn’t too bad either.

  • #9021
    L

    Participant

    feeling good and so energetic, but still scared of the future. i know day 29 is the day to cover whether you not going to drink the rest of your life or just drink less but feel in most social situations that is almost impossible….what inspires me is the quote from day 1…you just need to take the first step, you don’t need to see the whole staircase- for me it means : don’t think about it now, it will become clear…

  • #9046
    max

    Participant

    Today was a challenge(day 3). But I got through the it with popcorn and ice tea and then a hot bath. I find when I do something for myself it helps. I am not sure what will happen in a social situation .

  • #9082

    Sounds like you’re doing a great job taking care of yourself so far. As far as social situations go, Day 7 will help you out with that. And by the time you are in a social situation, you’ll have even more resources and tools to help you get by. Best of luck!

  • #11134

    Participant

    I can so relate. Had to go out for dinner last night with friends, all of whom were drinking. When I told the hostess that I wasn’t drinking (just said I was on a detox), I saw she looked a bit panicky and then had to scramble around in the fridge for something. It was a bit awkward but stuck with it and then it all worked out. But I did get that ‘are you sure you won’t have some wine’ question with the quizzical look when I said no. I also found myself over compensating with ‘having fun’ trying to prove that I wasn’t going to hold others back, judge them or bring the party down. On reflecting this morning, I found it interesting and wondered how often I am doing that – trying to make everyone else feel ok because somehow what I am doing might make me feel bad!!!! Seems a bit crazy. Anyway,I got through it and I feel great this morning – didn’t wake up with that pounding head, feeling lethargic like I wanted to sleep all day. Yay!

  • #11402

    Participant

    This is my first post . I’m on day three of not drinking end even though I started five days ago reading as luck would have it I skipped a couple days so I’m right on day three reading D3 not drinking . I had difficulty coming up with rewards I give myself four overcoming drinking or to defeat cravings . Everything I could come up with involved eating so that’s definitely not the route I want to go. any suggestions appreciated. I will say that currently I don’t have a bath tub and I don’t want to spend money on massages end that kind of stuff strange that I’m totally blanking on what else I could do for myself. Thx

    • #11704

      Participant

      Hi. I’m on Day 3 also and am trying to figure out some rewards that I’d like without breaking the bank. Here are some ideas that I’ve had: check out a library book or movie; subscribe to a magazine you like; buy a special piece of clothing that you’ve been wanting; buy a new CD; start a new hobby or craft; make a special meal; sign up for a community college continuing education class (not for credit, just for fun); or, maybe treat yourself to going out to a movie. Everybody has different interests, but you might like some of these. And try to reward yourself consistently at least 2 times a week. Keep up your momentum and good luck!!

    • #12190

      Participant

      Agreed, I don’t want food to be the reward, so decided a foot soak followed by foot rub is a nice way to be kind to myself. I love having cute relaxed feet so that’s my plan. Good luck!

      • #12192

        Participant

        I’m also on day 3 and am thinking I’ll buy some really nice bath oil (with the money I used to spend on alcohol) and enjoy a relaxing bath, or perhaps a nice scented candle I can light and enjoy the smell of

    • #16750

      Participant

      Curl up with a great book, binge watch a series (guilt free), go to the museum or an art gallery…

  • #11622

    Participant

    Day 3 was tough for me, and the fact that it’s a holiday weekend and hubby is on vacation exacerbated that. However, I made it through with the help of a hot bath, a distracting tv show, and herbal tea.
    Today is going to be a challenge as well..my kids are coming over for a Memorial Day bbq and typically I’d be having a few glasses of wine.
    I can do this.

  • #11723

    Participant

    Also on day 3, I found myself eating more than I usually do. I need to gear my mind somewhere other than food.

    • #11779

      Participant

      Hi Bettersally,

      I feel extra hungry, too. Going to pick up some healthy snacks for the rest of the weekend. You’re not alone!!

  • #11774

    Participant

    Today is my Day3. I went to a comedy show last night. I drank Diet Pepsi all night. Normally after the first half I wouldn’t remember most of the jokes. Today, I remember the whole night and didn’t really mind that people I went with were drinking. I felt proud of myself. I jokingly said I was giving my liver a rest when offered wine. It’s now Friday and I plan to drink herbal tea. I don’t think I can try de-alcoholized wine yet because it may be too triggering. Thank you all for your openness in sharing your posts. It helps me to know I’m not alone. Good luck to you all and well done!!!

  • #11782

    Participant

    Day 3 and feeling pretty good. Went to a function last night that I would normally have had wine and I had water – a little boring. Today I went to a picnic and had pepsi and water, and tonight I’m going to a retirement party and I’m bringing my non-alcohol beverages. This will be tough because it is all of my good friends and we always drink together. Knowing that I won’t feel and look bad tomorrow is my motivation for now.

  • #12118

    Participant

    Thanks for your sharing. I just did the exercises for Day 3 and feel pretty drained. Had a good cry over the ‘Before’ me. Thankfully the ‘New’ me turned that around. I have been in and out of AA for 25 years and I never really committed to the program, whereas I am loving this structured approach, read a bit each day – do some exercises, review. I look forward to spending a couple of hours each morning methodically going through this program – it’s an incredible start to the day. I wish I had this 20 years ago! Good luck to all for Day 3….see you tomorrow 🙂

    • #12193

      Participant

      Thank you for sharing

  • #12195

    Participant

    I think it’s all the sugar in alcohol that even on day 3 I’m now not getting that’s making me hungry for sweet stuff. Trying to go for healthy sweet stuff rather than cake etc and also being a bit kind to myself as I know it’s much better for me to not have alcohol even if I have the odd sweet thing…

  • #12208

    Participant

    I’m on Day 3, and this is my first post. Its been hard, but also hopeful, if that makes sense. I was sober for a few years and went back to socially drinking 3 years ago when I moved and got a new job back in sales. I noticed I was not dealing with my sadness and stress and it gradually has gotten worse over the last 3.5 years. One thing I wanted to share is that when you stop drinking, your body detoxes from the sugar and the Day 3-Day 5 are the most difficult. The way to counter-act that is to eat a lot more protein. So instead of feeding the sugar beast, I have been piling up on good healthy protein and fats. (Lots of eggs, salads with avocado and dressings, clean mean, fish, shrimp) It does scare me to think of not drinking EVER AGAIN, but it also feels empowering to be making a choice instead of “going with it” as I usually do. See you all back in here tomorrow!

  • #12215

    Participant

    Hi rkaymartin. I too am on Day 3. I have had so many Day 1’s in the past few years. I even got to 100 days and then convinced myself I could be a ‘normal’ drinker again ….! Guess you know how that went!! In the past I’ve read blogs and never posted any comments. I need to do this on my own in private and don’t want my husband to know the extent of my ‘secret’ problem. I’m terrified he will find out. I do worry about hiding the book and my journal – I’m too ashamed ! I’m giving this 100% – it’s a different way for me. At this moment it’s hard – the voice in my head keeps saying ‘just one’ so I’m going to read my journal and write down an action plan for Day 3.
    This has GOT to work for me – I want my life back.
    We can do this !

  • #12241

    Participant

    Ok I’m on day 3 had an ice cold ipa sitting in front of me. Decided to do the day 3 exercise before drinking and then skip to the tapping chapter. I’m happy to say the ipa and it’s 5 other bottles went down the drain. I have complete confidence in this program. I have a family wedding to go to this weekend and it will be a huge test.

  • #12244
    gem

    Participant

    Day 3 of the program for me but day 5 alcohol free. Feeling finally great, got first decent sleep last night. I too am giving this program 100%, v impressed with it so far. Just dipping my toe in the ‘posting’ water here, usually it’s a battle I fight alone but a similar forum helped me stop smoking so I am hopeful getting comfortable on the forum here will add to my toolkit of things to do whe the cravings come again.
    Safety in numbers to keep the craving sharks away I hope:)

    • #12352

      Participant

      You did well. I have never been able to pour my drinks down the drain. I seen it on a movie one and winced in pain. I think I could do it tonight though. I am getting a bit stronger as time goes on. Alcohol has itself wrapped around our minds (sometimes so tight) it hard to untangle all the grief it has caused.

    • #19510

      Participant

      Hey @gem – what quit smoking forum was it? Thanks!

  • #12351

    Participant

    Thought Day 3 was pretty easy and i rested so well.It is when I get to the teens that I start to tremble a bit. I’ve done up to day 14 that I could remember but not in this program. I like the structure very much as it takes you through one day at a time. If I get past day 14, I’ll be very-very happy as I don’t think I have done that in over 32 years (or before I drank). I do or did like drinking but things have changed and with every change, you must move on.

  • #12446

    Participant

    Day 3 – I was not an everyday drinker, more of a binge social drinker on weekends / social events. Now that I have started the program, I feel that I am thinking of alcohol more often. Probably because maintaining sobriety is always on my mind, and I tend to obsess over change. Has anyone else experienced this? Will it eventually go away? Thanx!

  • #12741

    Participant

    Hi all,

    I’ve struggled with this one because I have made a plan before. I know the first week will be the hardest. Then it will cruise along with only the odd bump/craving. The problem is that about 30 days in I tend to forget how bad drinking was for me. So I’m really focussed on that pain point, making it as clear as I can. Below is my plan (I pinched the idea of buying a magazine from some of you in this thread, good cheap reward).

    The plan for sobriety:

    I will do the Solution homework every morning. This will allow me to retouch with my commitment and goals at the start of the day and to live the changes I’m making in my life all day.

    I will walk with the dog when I have an urge to drink (or to plan to drink) during the day. I will stop and recognise every bird, every flower. I will be present in the moment instead of making plans to use in the future.

    In the evenings I will cook more. I will look up new, healthy recipes to make. I will enjoy the process of buying fresh ingredients, and preparing healthy food for my loved ones.

    I will always have a non-alcoholic drink available – cranberry and water, tonic or ginger ale.

    Each Wednesday and Saturday I will reward myself with a new magazine from McGee’s. Anything I like.

  • #13050

    Participant

    I found it a little hard to re-read my old self. Right there I felt an urge to drink. I felt bad. I felt like I had to escape myself. Then I read my new self, and felt a little better. Seeing where I will be next year. I have tried so much in the past to escape this prison (15 years of trying). I think I have found a program (a full program) that will actually help me this time. Everyday now I am waking up and looking forward to what my homework will be for me today. Is it really possible to actually have success after all of these years of searching? I am rally looking forward to the later dates, and what my mental health will be.

  • #13072

    Participant

    Just a little note I don’t re-read the old me it was hard enough writing it.

  • #13291

    Participant

    Day 3 and I feel good other than having really bad sleep the past two nights. I am so tired today that I am bound to crash tonight. It’s Friday and usually I would be having some wine or a cocktail right now but today I had total clarity that that wasn’t in the cards. It’s not something I had to dwell on. It’s part of the 100% which is awesome. What I’ve been doing lately in my attempts to put some parameters on my drinking would surely fall thru on a Friday and then on a Saturday. If I had managed not to drink I would likely have done it on Sunday. It’s nice not to think about it because it’s not an option.

    I actually told my sister about this today even though I had no intention of talking about it just yet. I will be with my family on Day 31 and we need to confront my mother on some of her behaviors which we suspect may now include some alcohol issues. I feel this program would benefit her with her overall current situation and that is what prompted the discussion with my sister. It actually wasn’t hard to tell her and I told her I don’t quite know where I will finally land on all of this but overall I feel good and just want to keep heading to better and better.

  • #13553

    Participant

    Are there any examples of the detailed no-drinking plan? Thanks ~ also, could the posts shift so that most recent posts are at the toP?

    Collins

  • #13581

    Participant

    Today I ran into a bit of drama regarding my ex. I found that the negative emotions made me feel like I really wanted a few drinks to relax and forget about it. I played a mental back and forth game to see if I could justify it, but was not able to justify the drinks. 100% right? I went for a walk with a friend. Walking is my go to. Great work everyone! We are all in this together.

  • #13711

    Participant

    Hey guys, just wanted to thank you all for the great ideas and thoughts on Day 3. This is tough but the tools from the book are really helping me get through. I am a blocked artist/painter and have known for a long time that alcohol is just a way for me to stay blocked as an artist. Until now I just couldn’t stop drinking even though it kept me from what I love most in this world. My strategy is to always have my sketchbook at hand and when the desire to drink strikes I will instead do what I love. Vision is everything for a practicing artist and I have finally figured out that alcohol destroys creative vision…thanks for listening.

  • #13846

    Participant

    Day three was tough for me.. I had a stressful day and I’m unclear at the moment if it became even more stressful because I knew I was committed to not having a glass of wine at the end of the day or if it truly was a stressful shitty day. I came home, got in the tub, put on some jazz music and tried to relax but I literally cried like a baby. It’s as if my favorite friend (Wine) wasn’t there to help me unwind. Today is day 4 and I’m feeling better. Going to a concert tonight with my husband and kids and am a little nervous but not too bad. I have never gone to a concert with out drinking so we shall see..

  • #14266

    Participant

    Learning about the evidence that I would try 2x as hard to avoid pain that find pleasure, was very helpful. And Luckily I had been very nauseous the last 2 days, so I didn’t feel like food or wine. My high blood pressure is disturbing as I am on meds. So the fear of having a stroke made me not even venture to that internal debate which normal end up in the negative. I did however have a big stressful event this week, and that pain of deceit and broken relationship did leave me more determined to transform into the ‘new me’. I look forward to having lots of nighttime energy as even though my kids don’t think I drink too much (mostly because I try to hide it) – but I know that I cannot wait for them to go to bed, so I can have my last glass before falling asleep way too early. I am truly excited of overcoming this and becoming my long-forgotten creative,bubbly self.Honoring God with my life! The ideas for rewards are also difficult for me as I am not a pamper-myself person…but soon my passions will return. Strongs for everybody for the next step.

    • #14386

      Participant

      How do you comment on a post rather than posting a NEW comment? I intended to comment on a specific post, but it just showed up at the end of the thread. Help? Oh. Never mind. I think I figured it out….

    • #14393

      Participant

      @kairos153, I’m happy you made this commitment. Maybe you can correct course before your children suffer the negative effects of your over drinking. Try not to post when under the influence. Do the homework for each day at the time drinking would start. Stay strong, Sobriety Seeker! Sina

  • #14385

    Participant

    I am also on day 3 and have come to the same conclusion that I would try much harder to avoid pain than to attain pleasure. The onslaught of emotions that come with the exclusion of alcohol has always been my downfall, but I believe the 30 Day Solution book/web content may be the solution I’ve been seeking. I’m 51, and I’ve been drinking for more years than not…envisioning myself in five years was really hard, and I’m really, really glad the meditation didn’t make me go ahead 10 years. Feelings are hard, but with an outlet (journal) and support maybe we can all learn to deal with them. Stay with us!

  • #14636

    Participant

    I am also at day 3. For me this is my second attempt with this programme. However it feels different this time, I feel much more ready to finally win my battLe with the Wine Witch. I am a 47 year old mother of 2 beautiful children. I no longer want to be spending my time either drunk, hungover or craving wine. I want more from life. I want my enthusiasm and motivation back. I just need to stay strong and count the days – I’m sure they will stack up quicker than I realise and I can finally be free.

    Ruth

    • #20535

      Participant

      Oh my. Reading these forums is so compelling. We all have so much in common. We all thrive when present and sober. We all hurt when we are numbing with alcohol or other substances/activities. Interesting, how the purpose is to numb, but the pain is so great. In my before and after, I wrote about the weddings of my two children. For my daughter’s wedding, I was using. And I remember so little of the entire weekend, and in the photos, I look like it. 2 years later, for my son’s wedding, I was completely present and sober. There was so much pure joy and celebration, and I remember every single moment. And in the photos, I look like it. I am going to print one of each photo onto a small card, that I can carry and have as a reminder of numb and present. The choice is so clear. Thank you all for sharing your journeys, your struggles, your victories, what works, what doesn’t, your kindness, your support. It makes a difference knowing I’m not alone.
      LMH

  • #14723

    Participant

    Hello Everyone. This is my Day 3, and my first post. Day 7 of not drinking. I have fought the monster for years. Been to very expensive treatment centers twice, and did not find AA quite for me (even though I made it through the steps). For a long time, I would have long stretches between binge/recovery, but those stretches have gotten shorter and shorter over the past year. Thank goodness I came across this book. This program makes sense. I like having specific actions to take every day, and a plan that builds on itself. I love having this online community. Quitting drinking is never hard – it’s the managing the anxiety and depression and shame that has dogged me since a child that is the challenge. But I am coming at this problem with many guns and I am completely, undeniably, immovably determined to resolve these issues once and for all so I can live the life I’ve always dreamed, but could never quite appreciated or feel that I deserved.

  • #14728

    Participant

    Welcome tetbury2016. I too have drank excessively over the years and have made the decision like you to sort it out once and for all. Today is my day 6 AF. I have been here so often before but this time with the 30 DSS I am 100% committed. Stay strong we can do this. Looking forward to feeling the light of sobriety in my life and loving being hangover free.

  • #14781

    Participant

    Today is my day three. I have had many day ones over the last ten years, a few 30 day sobriety days, always ending up blacked out somewhere. I did one 88 day 10 ten years ago. My wife, who may be soon my former wife, told me about this program. I’ve been in and out of AA over the last 10 years, as well. I’m away from home visiting family and drinking buddies for the next week. For some reason I can stay sober when I’m away from home. I feel good. I wrote my action plan this morning. Actually, I’m shocking myself by writing this post. I guess I’m just looking for some encouragement and ideas to maintain what I have started many times, it seems. I have done all the work. Glad I’m not hungover, today.

    • #14815

      Participant

      Today is my day 3. Day 4 being alcohol free. Starting to sleep better. This is my first post. The 30daysolution has given me a renewed confidence I can enjoy life without alcohol. I do not drink everyday, but having 6-8 pints with friends at the local watering hole 3-5 times a week was taking its toll. I am looking forward to progressing through the “days”. This weekend will be a test. My year end party for my golf club is this Sunday. I know I will be strong and maybe even golf better???

      • #14816

        Participant

        Welcome to the Sober Coaster as a fellow Sobriety Seeker dubs this wild ride. You won’t regret the price of this ticket, and the dividends just keep multiplying .
        And YES, YOU WILL GOLF BETTER ! And you’ll be able to hold your head high with pride! So hang on to the 100% Commitment and enjoy the year end party fully present! What you see may enlighten and amuse you as your cohorts get blitzed!
        Give us a full report! Best to you! Sina

  • #15010

    Participant

    Although I’m on day 3, I’m 7 days alcohol free. It’s a constant struggle for some reason. 10 Years ago I went through a program to get off cocaine and I was sober for 10 months. In that 10 months I got my dream job, met a great guy and bought a house. After the 10 months I started drinking again and lost nearly everything over the years. I’m looking forward to getting back to the me that I can be….The motivated and driven risk taker, free from any substance….I want my life back, for my sake and my children’s

  • #15301

    Participant

    My day 3 is going great. I have decided to drink 4 liters of water a day, so for the last couple of days I have filled up an empty gallon milk jug every morning and polished it off by the time evening rolls around. I’m so tired of drinking 🙂 But it makes me feel full and I’m dropping weight too.

    I have solved my ‘what am I going to do in the evening?’ in a couple of ways. 1) Every evening I am going to do my 30 Day Solution reading and work, including the optional exercises. This will take up some time. 2) I will always have a good novel on hand to read. I have never been able to drink and read for some reason – I just can’t concentrate even after one drink. So, reading it is! I REALLY enjoy reading, and used to to a LOT more of it, so it’s like the world has opened up to me again in that regard. My mind feels like it’s filling up again, rather than being drained by just having a glass of wine and mindlessly watching Netflix.

  • #15320
    mrd

    Participant

    Rodrigo! Congratulations on beginning your journey and your 100% commitment! I love your attitude and the solutions that you’re finding for yourself to make this work for you. I found the reading and the Solution, along with daily journaling to be a real, full-time commitment, and I appreciated being able to fill my time with something that was bringing me closer to the goal. I just hit 122 days of thriving in my sobriety, and I’m so grateful for this gift of a new life. Keep going and keep up the good work!

  • #15632

    Participant

    Day 3 for me today in sobriety and the book. I am trying to turn my entire routine on its head so that I break any habits that led to my drinking lifestyle. I am finding it hard to not oversleep – but likely because I had years with broken, restless sleep up until now. I am exercising during my “witching hour” rather than in the morning. I have suspended all of my other goals for the time being to just concentrate on this one goal of getting and staying sober.

    I have let some of my closest friends know that I am taking a break from drinking – to lose the “christmas weight”. I suggested that a friend and I go for lunch rather than dinner because I am not tempted to drink during lunches at a restaurant but would still find it hard at this point not having wine for an evening meal.

    I look at all of the people who have chosen a life of sobriety and realize what good company I am in! These people are often very intelligent and accomplished and they still found themselves in the same boat as me. If they can overcome this and life a full and beautiful life – so can I. I have so much to be grateful for.

  • #15704
    rl

    Participant

    I blew it last night – and drank. I feel awful today, physically and emotionally. But I am just going to keep going and let this make my resolve stronger. I am happy when I don’t drink and miserable when I do –

    • #15758

      Participant

      Sorry you had to suffer through another “morning after” RL. You can do this! It’s just a little blip in the road.

  • #15962

    Participant

    Pendulum Solution

    As a winemaker

    I can spit wine that I taste during bottling or any other time like I did yesterday without swallowing it
    non-alcoholic beer tastes fine if I feel like it

    remind myself about how well I sleep and feel emotionally right now without alcohol
    remind myself of how well I interacted with a friend, who used to trigger my judgmental side, on Skype today, i.e. I didn’t judge him

    remind myself of how well I feel right now without alcohol
    remind myself that I dropped 1.5 lbs in 4 days without alcohol and if I keep it up for 90 days until Easter dinner with my tribe my body mass index will go from “overweight” to “normal” and my liver will heal completely

  • #16044

    Participant

    Well, I am grateful for all these postings! It helps to explain why I ate a whole pan of cinnamon rolls this morning! It is funny and it is not! I have understood for a very long time the sugar-alcohol connection. It just really came home to roost this morning. And there was an emotional trigger – since I couldn’t have alcohol well heck – just eat the rolls! And I feel awful! So there you go! So many lessons driven home in one pan of cinnamon rolls. I guess you could say that this was actually a good day! Now, got to go eat something healthy and get on the treadmill!

    Thank you for all the wisdom shared in these postings.

  • #16330

    Participant

    Quit drinking strategies that I’ve been using:
    Lemons & limes are my new friends, in club soda, sparkling water, or plain water.
    Club soda and lime is a great drink when hanging with your drinking friends.(Or plain tonic and lime)
    If you want try something different, try Goslings ginger beer (regular or diet) with lemon. I find the ginger zip really kills the alcohol desire. (Try it straight up in a martini glass if you need to, people will ask you what you’re drinking.)
    Other waters I have made: cucumber water, cinnamon water, cinnamon clove water, ginger water.
    I started a booz box. Like a cus box. I’ve thrown out all my alcohol, so 1st I’ll have to by some. So, when the urge starts getting to me, I write an IOU $____ for whatever I think I’d spend if I did go out, and put it in my box. Some time later I’ll treat myself to something other than booz with the money I’ve saved. Maybe I’ll have enough to buy that boat I’ve always wanted.
    I got this little mental tidbit from another book, “THINK THE DRINK ALL THE WAY THROUGH”. As in how are you getting home, who are you with that you don’t embarrass yourself, and do I want to feel like crap tomorrow, can I afford to feel like crap tomorrow. Also, review your “old you” and the “new you”.
    Good Luck to all.

  • #18647

    Participant

    I usually would have a nice cold alcohol drink ( went to Vodka so no one could smell it) after work while making dinner It was my reward after all I work hard high stress – what ever I told myself and of course that one drink became several also becoming stronger and stronger So Day 3 from the point of coming home to after dinner was very difficult I drank water then Pepsi then another Pepsi I was then able to get to my journal and read the before me and the new me. I feared I would fail I reviewed more of the added sources and I made it to bed sober. I didn’t think it would be so hard so soon. It helped me to fill up on other fluids so I didn’t really have room or thirst for anymore- is this ok ? Or avoidance ??

  • #18654

    Participant

    Hi @wings62 and welcome to the Sober Coaster a thrilling ride well worth the price of admission! It’s absolutely ok. Whatever method or tools you employ as your resolve builds….it is all good. Breaking any habit of long standing us difficult, especially an addictive behavior like overdrinking.
    You’re smart to fill your brain with empowering messages, and your mouth with anything but alcohol! Keep posting and stay strong as momentum takes hold. Onward! Sina

  • #19441

    Participant

    Day 3 and tonight will be a first major challenge against what I know is a huge trigger: dinner with my sister and her husband!
    For 40 years they have been my “fun” older siblings. In fact, I probably started drinking with them at about 15 or 16.
    I have been preparing for this since Day 1 since I knew this was coming. In fact, I almost waiting until this Sunday to start, but figured there is no time like the present, there will always be challenges. We live in a world where social events mean lots of wine (my issue) and I am just going to have to tough it out. I have a plan on being honest without going into too much detail. Then I will really get to taste and enjoy my dinner out. I might follow up with ice cream or gelato! – instead of one more glass of wine…or two. Wish me luck. I will need it, but I know I can do this!

  • #19508

    Participant

    How did it go MMR1960 ? I am dreading Thanksgiving & Xmas for the same reason – all of my family & friends drink (a lot)! I made up my mind not to drink during Thanksgiving because it is during the 30 days but Xmas is not (and I have to fly). In the past, I have always gotten plastered to get on a plane. Wah!

    • #19511

      Participant

      Thanks for asking, karakucha: I nailed it last Friday night….it was easier than I thought it would be. I asked the waiter for a fun mocktail from the bar and then the conversation got going. My brother in law was actually very interested in what I was doing and very supportive. I think there are plenty of people out there who might want to do what we are doing, but are afraid to try or are just stuck. I know I was! I have been out two more times for dinner since then and handled it pretty much the same. It is that first drink order that is the trick, at least for me. After that I don’t even think of it and I actually taste my food! What a concept! I am now on Day 9 and am very hopeful that I can keep the momentum going. So one thing I noticed that I never would have before: when you are ordering drinks they bring the wine and drink menu, but do not list any non-alcoholic drinks – instead you have to ask them what they have. I have to believe that I am not the only person in the restaurant dealing with trying to stay sober. It would be nice if the restaurant had some choices on that drink menu!! The weekend approaches – wish me luck. I wish everyone out there the best. Here’s a laugh. I gave blood the other day and the staff person there commented on how hydrated I was by looking at my veins….not sure how she knew, but I will take it! I didn’t mention to her that I have probably had several gallons of seltzer water and camomille tea in the last 9 days!!

      • #19520

        Participant

        @mm1960 That’s great you could open up to them. I am holed up in the apartment avoiding temptation although the whole point is not to be lonely. Oh well, at least I have you guys/gals. I’ll try the mocktail tip.

  • #19509

    Participant

    @amazinggrace – thanks for the THINK THE DRINK ALL THE WAY THROUGH tip

  • #19514
    gem

    Participant

    @karakucha – Quitnet was a great resource for me – good luck

    Ps I´m now 4 years off the cigs although still taking NRT lozenges but I´m 361 days alcohol free now…all the hard work & early sucky days are worth it. Hangover free life. Clear head. More cash. Less shame. One day at a time:)

    • #19519

      Participant

      Hi @gem – I haven’t smoked in a while but still inhaling nicotine with a vape pen. Want to get rid of that expense (plus who knows what it actually does to the body). You almost have 1 year w/o booze! Congrats! Thank will be a great thing to give thanks for on Thanksgiving!

  • #19521

    Participant

    Hey @karakucha. I see you posting here a lot. Do you want to follow this program? In order to begin, you must commit to 30 days without alcohol.

    ONWARD. Sina

  • #19643

    Participant

    I am on Day 3 of this program and also sobriety. I no longer feel sick when I drink at night, and no hangover in the morning. My energy is increasing daily. I have more patience and can do more at home. I went to the pool today and walked the dog. In my family we are grieving the loss of our dear son and brother. My son died from a dose of Fentanyl in Sept. 2016. We all had been through a stressful 7 years living with his addiction. My husband and I attended weekly NarAnon Parent Support Group for a year. After our son died, I worked with a grief counselor weekly for abt 5 months. I also attend a monthly grief group for parents who have lost children. During all this time I have tried to stop drinking several times. No long-term success. I belong to Women for Sobriety and we meet weekly. Very supportive, lots of good ideas for many aspects of our lives. I think I was trying to escape my grief by drinking. So quitting drinking should allow me the energy to grieve successfully. I know our grief will be ongoing, and I’m scared of it. I’m scared of being so sad. Drinking just made that worse. Without alcohol I think I will be better able to deal with this grief.

  • #20442

    Participant

    May of last year (2017), I was three weeks into my 30-Day and was doing and feeling so amazing ~ and then I went to Northern Cali for five days and went back to drinking again. Over the past nine months, I think I tried to restart the 30-Day three more times. Each time I would get a few days into it and then stop. Perhaps it’s because I lost my job in early 2017 and was unemployed much of last year ~ too much time on my hands. This feels different now ~ I feel motivated and excited like I did the first time. I’m in a much more positive and healthy head space than I was last year, and I have a project that I’ve recently begun that I want to succeed SO much more than I want to keep drinking. I think my “rock bottom” was last week when I had a few glasses of Chardonnay to relax, which led to the usual pattern of TMI on Facebook, which led to the usual shame spiral, followed by a hangover and lying to everyone at work about having a migraine. Then I picked up the 30-Day book for what I know is the fifth and final time. Day Three with the Pendulum and the Pleasure Principal is truly connecting with me this time. My life is getting more calm and centered and happy each day, and I can see the life I’ve always dreamed of right on the horizon. I’ve got my sights set on that and I’m not turning back.

    • #20443

      Participant

      Welcome @katseye2018. I do believe you’ve got your eye on the prize this time Kat! Thanks for sharing…please continue to do so!!!
      Onward, Sina

  • #20450

    Participant

    Hello! I am on Day 3 for the 2nd time. I have hit rock bottom….my soul is crying! I am 65 years old and have been drinking since I was a teenager. I had a 5 year period of complete abstinence about 20 years ago. I loved that period of time. I felt alive and many wonderful things happened that changed the course of my life for the good. I have a “good” life, but I am stagnant. Most people do not know that I struggle with alcohol. My health is suffering and I have a doctor appointment next week to get a read on it. I feel like all of my organs are screaming! I recently lost my sister from a massive heart attack at the age of 60. She was the 4th and last sibling to die from alcohol addiction. I am the last one standing. I refuse to follow in those footsteps and have my 85 year old mother bury another child! I am COMMITTED to thriving in sobriety. I know what it feels like and I will hold on to those feelings to pull me through. I am so grateful for this program. Thank you for being here. I hope I can be an inspiration too! Much Love and Gratitude!

  • #20451

    Participant

    OK, I’m on day 3 and also my 3rd day without alcohol. I went out to dinner with my wife last night, I usually have 2 glasses of wine and she will have a little of mine, but she doesn’t drink much. She was surprised when I didn’t order wine, even though she felt like it was a night that she wanted a glass of wine. I drank 2 glasses of water and she mentioned that it seemed like I was cutting back, and I told her yes, just like we had been cutting back on saturated fat and trying to get to only having fish or chicken a few times a week. I said it was fine if she wanted have one. She did, and it was no problem for me.

    I don’t expect day three to be too hard – I know how I feel and I know I will think about stopping at the liquor store on the way home from working, but I also know drinking doesn’t make me feel better any more and I know I won’t feel better tomorrow if I did. So while I don’t really have a good written plan, I’m just done with all of it. I have enough stress and problems that won’t go away that I guess I’d just rather feel them than try to avoid them with alcohol any more. And there’s also the rowing machine – I can get on that and take out my stress on it, perhaps it will be my new “friend”

  • #122325

    Participant

    Day 3 an and 5 days NA. Yeah! We were out for pizza with family last night and they had wine and I stuck with my water with lemon. If course, I am now the DD but that’s ok!
    My strategy plan. Call my friend. Ask my spouse for support. exercise. Meditate or pray. Bake. Unclutter.
    Take my weight and BP daily. Golf. Read. Review.

  • #122369

    Participant

    Captains log day 3 – Certainly had to remind myself that I’m 100% committed after work today. Did the visualizations and wrote a plan and feeling quite content at present. Bring on day 4!

  • #122389

    Participant

    It’s day 3 and I’ve just finished my Day 3 Actions. I’m beginning to settle into a little morning routine, partly due to the loss of my cell phone. It’s not working at all. So instead of my usual news review while in the bath, I am now reading the 30 Day SS book for that day. It’s a great motivator. I get the gist of what’s expected for that day, but stop at the Actions part. Then I have breakfast while watching the day’s videos. After that, I go to a desk and complete the Actions for the day. In the evening, at the wine-witching hour before dinner I plan on taking a walk, and then after dinner, when I normally would have yet more wine, I’ll may walk again, or read. I am also trying to reduce my time in front of the tv as that is where/when I would also have more wine and begin the dreadful snacking. I may end up tweaking my plan some, but let’s see how this goes first.

    • #122391

      Participant

      Hi there @thelodger75 !
      I think that with your positive attitude and motivation, you have a bright future ahead! I’m enjoying your posts/progress!

      It is said that “Those who fail to plan, plan to fail.”
      That is most certainly NOT you!
      I’m excited for you as well.
      It’s encouraging to know that the email function on the Companion Website is again functional.
      This site has many glitches, yet the Program is sound and one of the best I have encountered.
      Success can be yours!
      Onward, Sina

  • #122706

    Participant

    My strategy to overcome and even prevent cravings at times will include:

    Reading this book and doing the daily exercises (especially at the times I would normally drink), watch the videos included, exercising, hugging my baby kitties, doing some awesome hypnosis videos and exercises that I found on YouTube, meditating and yoga, making hot tea and cocoa, play on my Facebook sober sites, read my spiritual books, and do my Ganesh Mantra. I will reward myself with a movie, bingo night, new book, etc.

    • #122708

      Participant

      I feel energized reading your Strategies FaithHipe38!
      And envious of you having those little kitties!!
      It’s amazing that when Alcohol is removed from our equations our Journeys can resume unencumbered!
      Onward! Sina

  • #122793

    Participant

    How do people cope with a spouse who drinks excessively and has no plans of quitting with me? The pain I feel watching him self destruct is part of my incentive to quit drinking, but the liquor cabinet will always be full.

    • #122799

      Participant

      Hi Mharvey78
      Welcome to this amazing program!
      I don’t have an easy solution to your dilemma. For now I hope you are able to focus on yourself.
      You may inspire your partner as he sees the positive changes in you.
      Keep posting here. If you can access “Site Wide Activity ” you’ll be able to see posts from people currently active on the site .
      Although there is a lot of SPAM, the site still functions well enough for your success.
      Onward! Sina

      • #122800

        Participant

        Thanks! Just getting a reply helps.

    • #123252

      Participant

      Hello, I’m currently in this same predicament. I was wondering if you can give me tips on how to cope? My situation is probably a bit different but any advice would help. Thanks in advance and hope you’re thriving in sobriety!!

      • #123254

        Participant

        Hi Rebeccagrady34
        I’d you’re asking about how to cope with a partner who isn’t on the same page as you, I can offer that trying to change another, IMO, isn’t within our power. I am guessing that for everyone who complains about a partner who doesn’t want to stop drinking presently, there are equal if not greater people here who ARE the partner who haven’t been the willing-to-change member of the relationship! So I ask, what could that (non problem drinking) partner have done to convince you that you must change?
        I hope you see that my point is that decisions to change come from within. We can lead through example. However when we give advise, criticism or diagnoses, these are most likely met with denial, hostility or deep sadness.
        For now, I would focus on myself!
        Onward. Sina

        • #123256

          Participant

          Thank you for your insight! I believe I am on the same page as you now. I went to an AA meeting tonight for the first time. I’m not sure if I will complete the program there, I just wanted to be around other sober people and maybe get some opinions. And some women I talked to had a very similar response as yours. I can only work on me and my sobriety. I’m about to do my Day 4 actions. Thank you for your input!!

  • #122842

    Participant

    Day 3 for me and I was so excited it was day 3. Day 2 was a struggle I will say, evening comes and I’m like well wine time. Tomorrow is day 4! 4 days in a row without having wine! Having a little hot tea before bed. Hoping tomorrow I am as excited as I was today 🙂

    • #122846

      Participant

      Welcome RobynGoblin93 !
      Congratulations on your continuing Sobriety!!!
      Keep posting for inspiration and support!
      Onward! Sina

  • #122847

    Participant

    I went to Thanksgiving and drank tea and water. It was my first Thanksgiving in years without wine. I survived and I had fun.

    • #122848

      Participant

      Hi Hlewis02!
      Great news about your happy Thanksgiving! That IS something to be grateful for!!!
      Onward! Sina

  • #123060

    Participant

    Hello… brand new to program. Work a job that involves 2 days a week of 16 hours each, so I am already behind on 30 day program. Am on day 3 when I should be on day 5. Have others faced this? Is it a hindrance to having the magic happen? Any thoughts are welcome. I’ll always be a few days behind as a result of this.

    • #123064

      Participant

      Hello jumpstart. I am on day 15 and been trying to keep up with the exercises some days I have to catch up on previous days work I think as long as you keep doing some exercises journaling or posting this program really works to help you realize that drinking doesn’t solve any problems it just creates More
      I have 15 days without alcohol And other than when I was pregnant with my son that is the longest I’ve had in 40 years. Keep posting best of luck. I look forward to hearing how you are doing

  • #123253

    Participant

    So today is actually my day 4 but I didn’t post in the forum yesterday, and I noticed all of help and support after I posted in Day 2. So I lost my passion for crafting and making hemp necklaces and things like that when I was drinking. That occupied my time more than my passions. So I thought a reward I could give myself for not drinking when I had the urge would be a small charm, lace, hemp or something. Something I can utilize so re-engage my passions.

  • #16639

    Participant

    Hi @blacktulipgirl. I loved reading this post. If your stalking results in your sharing this wonderful inspiration with us, then it’s a really good thing to stalk as you do. Thank you for this gift 😁! Looking forward to more gems from you! Onward, Sina

  • #16752

    Participant

    and fat – coconut oil in the coffee is a nice addition adds a bit of flavor without sweetness and you get good fats to help you stay satisfied

  • #16754

    Participant

    Hey @sunfish….I’m happy to see you fishing around in these waters!
    Welcome to the Forums and the “Sober Coaster “!!
    Tips….It’s great to read posts people have made , because we share so many common concerns. Just take note of the date of the post you are responding to….
    To connect with current folks who post in any Solution and also starting the program in real time around when you are, one thing is to tap on “Where to ?” Then on Site wide activity.

  • #122238

    Participant

    Hi apriora44,

    I am on Day 3 also, and sober for 6 days. It took a few days for me to decide if I wanted to do the 30DSS.

    I like the idea of jsing the Producitve app. I will look into that.

    How I am planning to overcome cravings is to:
    1. not go to the restaurants where I typically drink
    2. Do my daily reading at the time that i would normally drink (after work).
    3. start to walk again after work and feel the effects of being healthy again.
    4. tell my husband more a out this to be accountable.
    5. I will continue to seek the pleasure of feeling and thriving in sobriety.

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