I wish the ‘movie moment’ exercise was on day 1

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This topic contains 6 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by

 
Participant
5 months, 1 week ago.

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  • #20794

    Participant

    Soooo, I did the movie moment yesterday, and have been thinking about it since. I’ve been feeling so motivated and amazing since beginning the program, but I feel like replaying all of my regrets, guilt, and shame in the activity wasn’t helpful at all. I had already done the work to let go of the old, ‘lush’ me and release all of that negativity in phase 1. To have to go back there when I’ve already come so far was pretty disappointing. I wish I would have skipped it and instead, focused on taking action towards the future me, not rehashing all of the mortifying moments of my drinking life. Maybe it’s helpful for some, but for me, it brought back a lot of shame… A LOT! Maybe I would have felt different if it was in day one or two somewhere, but in day 8, it felt like an emotional step backwards.

  • #20796

    Participant

    Hi @rachel1975.
    Here’s a link to a very realistic. IMO, commentary on dealing with the shame we encounter in this Journey.
    I hope it lifts your spirits and strengthens your resolve.!
    Onward, Sina

    • #20817

      Participant

      💗 Thank you, Sina! 💗

  • #20840

    Participant

    I thought the exercise was helpful. Everything you write down in your journal enforces why you should quit or cut back on drinking alcohol. My movie consists of taking shot after shot, finishing every bottle, pouring water into a vodka bottle to hide the amount I drank, waking up just to start drinking again, hiding glasses, hiding bottles, lying about my drinking. Yes these are things I’m ashamed of. The point is what would your biggest role model think of your movie? This should enforce why we should quit or cut back on drinking. You are not alone in this. I wish you the best of luck!

    Dan

  • #118930

    Participant

    I found the movie moment liberating. As I watched, I felt such sadness, understanding and empathy for this person desperately trying to do the right thing and failing time and time again. Instead of my usual pattern of beating myself up, I finally saw someone who wasn’t bad, but broken and desperate for freedom. It got rid of such a lot of self loathing. It didn’t bring back shame because I’m determined that this part of my life is over and I’m moving forward, but I can finally stop beating myself up for my perceived failure.

  • #119107

    Participant

    I watched my movie this morning (with Kris Kristofferson as my person to the right of me – and boy was he not impressed). I mostly felt sorry for that girl on the screen. She had a lot going for her… I played the audio and immediately flashed to scenes of my worst escapades. I opened my eyes and started jotting down notes. “she gave up on giving up” “she quit trying” “knows denial and keeps going anyway” “she’s so disappointed in herself” “why do you keep doing this??!” “social anxiety”….

    wait wait. WHAT? Social Anxiety? Who wrote that!? I’m a social wonderthing! That can’t be me!

    Yup. I had my aha moment. I’m going to really watch for this over the next 2 weeks as I have some serious socializing scheduled. I’m so glad I saw that movie today.

  • #121404

    Participant

    For 8 years I was drunk. I wasn’t in denial, I knew exactly what I was doing and I never tried to hide it. Sometimes I thought I had lost my will power, but it wasn’t that. I had lost my will to live. For 8 years I was drunk because I just didn’t give a fuck. Only just now, today, do I finally realize that. It wasn’t an alcohol problem. It was a passive approach to suicide.

    My person to the right believes I will make it this time because I have finally found something to live for and I will not disappoint. I wouldn’t be in this course if I hadn’t found something worth living for.

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