Merge Meditation: It sucks

This topic contains 2 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by

 
Participant
2 years, 8 months ago.

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  • #14732

    Participant

    Hi,

    I was listening to the merge meditation but I do not feel comfortable about it and interrupted it about 75% in. I dont think it is wise to identify with the “old me” and I dont see any positive qualities that I can extract from the “old drunK”.

    This is the only exercise that I have decided to interrupt and not proceed with it. I feel that it is harmful to merge at all with that old cadaver. As far as I am concerned that old cadaver has dies and it is a new Phoenix that has arisen to take its place.

    I dont relate to that old corpse and I feel that this “merge meditation” could cause more harm than good. I did enjoy the earlier meditation where we “exploded” the old cadaver. But to merge with it, Im sorry I dont agree with any therapeutic value that would arise from doing so.

    Would love to hear somebody else’s thoughts on this.

    I would never refer to myself as “An alcoholic in recovery” or as “An ex-problem drinker” Or even as “I used to have a problem drinking so I stopped”

    Instead I am a person “That does not drink”. That is how I see myself now and I think it is the most beneficial way to proceed. No need to tell new friends you meet about your skeletons from the closet, about your sordid stories while drinking and so forth.

    If offered a drink I just refuse it. No thanks. I dont drink. Why not? I tell them “I just dont drink”. period.

    I dont drink because I dont like it. I dont like how it feels. I dont like how it tastes.

  • #14738

    Participant

    Hi fc321. I think you are smart to not do a solution that you do not think would be helpful for you. Everyone has to follow their own path and do what is right for them. You are trusting your own judgement, which is great😀

  • #15222

    Participant

    Hi fc321 I totally agree with you on this merge meditation!! I didn’t even make it very far into the
    meditation when I shut it off. I quite honestly couldn’t find any positive qualities associated with the old drunk me. I think maybe for me I have in my mind the pendulum swinging back and forth, where the old
    drunk me is on one end and the vibrant, excited, positive me is on the other … and that is where I want to stay, I see the old me as weak and insecure, whereas the new me is very strong, loving and open. I also liked the explode thru me meditation…the old me is gone!!!

    I am so grateful for all the other work in this programme, it is amazing and I have come a long way from
    27 days ago, thank you!! I have a whole new approach to alcohol …. I don’t like it and I never thought I would believe this but I don’t need it anymore!!! and that is a whole new me!! believe me ….

    These forums are awesome, I don’t say much but I read them every day… you give me so much hope and inspiration, thank you all!!!

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