Mourning Myself

This topic contains 8 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by

 
Participant
2 days, 4 hours ago.

  • Author
    Posts
  • #7917

    Participant

    First, let me say that I am feeling empowered by the program. I am really benefitting from it and connecting to it. However, I do find myself mourning my former self. (My therapist likened my struggle with grieving). I am sad that I cannot have a beer. Beer was never my thing to get drunk–vodka and whiskey were it–I enjoyed beer like a wine enthusiast enjoyed fine wine. I loved trying new kinds and rating them and learning how to pair them with food. I got excited about the craft brewery market. I would try local beer when I travelled. I have to say goodbye to that passion because, as a quote in the book said today, I gave up my right to it. I am 95% done with the bargaining–the thought that maybe I can have a beer down the line–and have moved into grieving. I guess I will need to find another passion…..maybe root beer? Who knows…..that will come later….but suggestions are welcome!!

  • #7932

    Participant

    I can relate to this – definitely. Drinking has been tied into my lifestyle and identity for a long, long time. It is like saying goodbye and it is difficult. I love (or loved) craft beers too (IPAs, especially) I do hope to be able to enjoy them again on a take-it-or-leave-it basis in the future…but understand I have to concentrate on 100% now. I wish I had a suggestion for you — but I think just the awareness of the feeling of mourning and letting yourself experience it is big.

    • #7948

      Participant

      Thanks Jennie5309

  • #7944

    Yes, you are both 100% right, you are grieving a loss right now- the loss of a part of yourself, a part of your identity, and the loss of an old friend (alcohol). @jennie5309- the awareness and letting yourself truly feel the loss is absolutely huge. Ignoring it, pushing it away, only makes it come back stronger, demanding to be seen. For some people, just the acknowledgment is enough. Others need a bit more. If either of you are finding yourselves struggling to say goodbye, go ahead and have a “funeral”. We create rituals in order to honor a transition of moving from one thing to another. Having a ritual to honor moving from a drinking identity to a sober identity may be quite useful.

    @kperez- this could be something you do with your therapist if you’d like. To answer your question about finding a new passion, you’ll get an opportunity to explore new passions on Day 26. You can always peek ahead and check out the 101 New Activities List if you’re curious.

    • #7949

      Participant

      The idea of a ceremony/funeral is an appealing idea. I will think about this more and how I can symbolize this loss for me in a meaningful way. Thanks for your response and encouragement.

  • #11799

    Participant

    I had a “funeral” for my drinking self 18 years ago. It was resurrected some 9 months ago. I was thinking this time of having a funeral with a cremation and a burial at sea with a Bon Voyage non-alcoholic memorial party!! I seriously am gleaning so much from this program. Have taken the time needed to dig in and do the work and thrive in sobriety again. Thanks for all the authenticity in these forums.

  • #123761

    Participant

    The use of beer and malt beverages are very common in our society therefore they are very high demand in the market. Therefore, the essay shark and the other organizations are talking about their import and exports. The book mentioned in this blog is full of information regarding the trade.

  • #123824

    Participant

    kperez,
    If it is just the taste you are after, would you be able to substitute a non-alcoholic beer? If the answer is no, because they don’t taste good you may have to question what it really is. When I began dieting, I managed to acquire a taste for diet soda. Beer was (after all) an acquired taste. Every alcoholic drink is an acquired taste. So try to be honest and know that you can learn to like new beverages (without abusing them). I am now drinking Kombucha – a healthy fermented drink.

  • #123825

    Participant

    During the time (years ago) when I was in AA, I did a drawing of a casket with a wine bottle in it. It also included a broken wine glass. My sponsor said it was not a positive thing to do. Now I am regretful I did not save it. It was a good drawing and I did feel that I was in mourning.

You must be logged in to reply to this topic.

  • Register Here

    If you would like more information about The 30-Day Solution Companion Website before registering you can learn all about it HERE.

  • Available Now at Your Favorite Online Retailers!

    "The 30-Day Sobriety Solution is an amazing step-by-step program for getting your drinking (or any addiction) under control. It uses the latest and greatest methods for overcoming addictions." —Jonathan Robinson, M.A., M.F.T., former clinical director of the National Council of Alcohol and Drug Abuse (in Santa Barbara, CA.)

    Get the Audio Book

    Read by Jack Canfield & Dave Andrews

    "Jack Canfield and Dave Andrews have released a penetrating wind of possibilities that will blow open the shuttered windows and locked doors of addiction recovery that can never be closed again."—Dr. Jean LaCour, Co-founder of the NET Training Institute Center for Addiction and Recovery Education

    Order the audiobook today by clicking the retailers below:

    • rbutton_amazon
    • rbutton_BN
    • audible
    • AnazonCA

    For more information or to contact us, please email: support@the30daysolution.com

    For more information or to contact us, please see 30Day.Support