Home Page › All Forums › Day 7 – The Review Day & Bonus Solution Community Forum › So happy, excited and truly believing I've TRULY, FINALLY had my LAST "DAY ONE"!
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April 21, 2017 at 3:26 pm #17424Participant
Hi to everyone,
Well, I’ve successfully made it through Phase I and couldn’t be happier or more grateful to have found this unique program. I’ve actually been sober 15 days now and am obviously feeling really terrific on every level.
In addition to successfully overcoming not drinking at our dinner party last Saturday night – where everyone but me was drinking – I was faced with a very challenging (but oh, too familiar) issue involving someone very close to me, not my husband or daughter. This person has been wreaking havoc in my life for the last 20-25 years, has been drinking heavily most of this person’s life, and in & out of rehab several times. This person has – from what I’ve been told – significantly cut down the drinking, and I do believe this because I’ve seen some positive changes.
However, this person pulled the familiar trigger with me earlier this week, and I was able to remember “ERO”, take an immediate and brief pause/prayer to God to give me the right reaction, which He did. Ultimately the next day I received the desired outcome albeit through an intervention of others (even though I made it clear that not only did I not need an intervention, I didn’t really want one this time).
Dr. Phil always says we can’t keep doing the same things over and over and expect a different outcome, and he’s right. He’s also never touched alcohol according to several books he’s written.
I admit within a few hours after the conversation with this person I was tempted to drink because that’s always been my coping mechanism, but this time I didn’t. I’ve never made a commitment to God and myself about anything until finding this book and beginning the 30-Day Reboot. I’m elated that I was given the strength to overcome this incredible challenge – and even better – I have been given the wisdom and discernment needed on how to effectively and permanently eliminate this decades-old trigger from ever happening again.
I’m faithfully following every single thing these guys suggest and have plugged in numerous reminders on my phone to look at the photos of my specific journal pages to read out loud, visualize, etc.
April 21, 2017 at 6:31 pm #17428Participant
impi1112 . . . Seems a shame that a friend of such long standing is one that “triggers” you in some way. That sure feels like a drag! And to top it off, I don’t get why you are the one that needed the unwanted and unwelcome intervention. That one also stumps me! But, hey, there are many, many things that I just don’t get.
But it’s great that the program is working so well for you. Many experience that, including myself. Sounds like you’re making all kinds of progress and determined to stick with it so as to realize continued improvement. Great! Hope it all keeps flowing for you and that the “triggers” from the friend fade away. We do seem to have a built in mechanism that, when and if we access it, can help us deal with such unwanted annoyances. For some it might be deep breathing. Others might count to 10 or 20. Still others seem to find avoiding the individual for awhile, if that is possible.
Whatever you come up with, many Happy Trails along the way.
April 22, 2017 at 7:51 am #17433Participant
Thanks so much for the encouragement.
While I tried to keep the identity of this individual as vague as possible, the truth is it’s a family member who drank heavily for years, has achieved considerable success in their efforts to overcome this “B” known as “addiction”, but who has occasional slips now and then. And the person doing the intervention was also a family member, at the (I am sure) insistence of other family members who I made aware of what had gone down – AGAIN – in the event the repeat offender began a witch hunt as this is also the familiar pattern of which I have grown tired of and refuse to repeat.
I tried AA several times and refuse to label myself as an “alcoholic”. I have been healed by His stripes, and am merely walking that healing out by faith and with the help of (finally) what seems to be the effective solution I needed to come across. The one analogy given to me by my former sponsor (now a good friend of mine) is this: everyone raised in an alcoholic environment (as my siblings and I were) wears a director’s hat, each expecting the other to follow the script they’ve been handed. And for the most part I have seen this play out for years. Pun intended. Everyone’s reaction is so predictable, but that’s already changed on my part as a result of this past week’s events.
While I am seeking wise counsel from those I trust most regarding this recent, familiar offense, I pretty much know what I’m going to do, going forward, unless the counsel I receive is independently unanimous; even then, I will pray one more time and proceed as directed. I cannot simply exit the family I was born into, and have no desire to do so. I believe my plan of action is best for me, the offending party and all siblings in our dysfunctional family because in spite of everything, we do love each other.
As evidence of just how much I have tried to get sober in the past, I asked my husband a few years ago to install a lock on our solid teak buffet (part of which stores hard liquor). This was a big deal between us because it’s a gorgeous and costly piece of furniture, but more importantly, he does not believe I have a problem with alcohol because he has never seen me drunk. That’s because I was a high functioning professional and quite capable of maintaining composure and hiding how much I was drinking.
It feels SO GOOD to no longer be a hypocrite, I am SO DONE with self-loathing, guilt, shame, hiding my drinking. It feels SO GOOD to know that I am spot-on clean from the inside, out. I love waking up after a great night’s sleep, full of energy and not hung over. Not having to worry about what I may have said, done or written the night before.
Thanks again for your support.
Over and out.
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