That Meditation Left Me feeling Awful. Just Awful!

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Participant
1 year, 8 months ago.

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  • #11630

    Participant

    Did anyone else struggle with the releasing limiting beliefs meditation? I’ve been meditation and doing visualization exercises for about 6-months now and generally find them useful, but this one has left me in an absolute rage. WAY too much time was spend on the feeling state that is unhealthy and it got me right into an ugly place. Then it just skipped quickly through the “inner mentor stuff.” Ugh. I feel like it’s going to take all day of journalling and extra meditation to get rid of this emotional funk and undo the emotional damage done by this visualization. I’m a little disappointed in this. Did anyone else struggle?

  • #11637

    Participant

    joyfulgirl . . . not sure I’m following what you’re asking. Are you referring to Day 24 & the Meditation Solution? Or is the “releasing limiting beliefs meditation” a different one? — Either way, sorry to hear that the exercise stirred you up so much. Ugg! It’s no fun to be confronted with old memories, crap, or whatever it is that bubbled to the surface.

    In my opinion and experience, one does need to enter any of these internal states with a bit of caution. I do hope that the rage has subsided. If not, it may be that whatever has gotten activated within your ‘soul’, ‘psyche’, ‘inner being’, or whatever and however you describe your inner world essence needs some serious attention on your part. I’m not trying to analyze whatever it is that came up . . . I don’t have a clue what that might be and I’m not asking you to share it. It may be very, very private. That said, it may be that you could talk it through with someone you trust deeply. (There are coaches on this forum that may have expertise in the field of psychology.) – And I’m also not trying to imply or say directly that you need a ‘shrink’, who the heck would I be to say such a thing? Only you can decide what level of material got activated by the meditation.

    Whatever is going on for you, I do wish you the best with the inner material being presented. Some things, in my experience, can’t just be wished away, ignored, or imagined that it never happened. That said, it is sad when old, lingering, possibly below the surface material of our past exert such a nerve-jarring hold over our being.

    People like the Swiss Analyst Carl Jung pioneered such tools and techniques as Active Imagination to attempt to deal with unresolved, often negative, even unconscious emotions that can exert heavy leverage over our otherwise ‘in-control’ personalities. His technique involved giving voice to such energy through a dialogue with the more hidden parts. (It’s a kind of a meditation.) But I would caution you, this too can stir up a truck load of tension and even rage. It’s a drag, but if one is cursed/blessed with such active & dynamic daemon, it does seem important to at least attempt to resolve such energy. Otherwise, whatever it is that has stirred one up will return in some other way & form.

    None of that is meant to scare you or put you in fear of the inner unknown. Rather, it is to say that it may not be as easy and as tidy as is presented. We are each different and we each need to find our own personal pathways.

    I do truly wish you the very best in dealing with this issue. May your heart be calm again and your mind clear! May your rage turn into gold.

  • #11797

    Participant

    Hi @joyfulgirl.
    If you’re referring to Jack’s Releasing Limiting Beliefs recording from today, I cried floods of tears the first time I did this on a feeling of stuckness in my life, when I traced it back to things that happened years ago.
    This program can and does bring up incredibly intense feelings at times, both related to our drinking but also wider issues in our lives.
    What helped me a little towards the end of the meditation was when Jack also reminded us that the people in our lives who contributed to us feeling the way we did in the past were doing the best they could at the time with the knowledge and personal resources they had at that time. It’s hard to make this shift but it can help with coming to terms with things and eventually (although only when it feels right) thinking about forgiveness, both towards ourselves and others.
    I think you’ve done the right thing by being honest about how you feel, journaling about it, and sharing this on the forums, all of which are brave actions which I think will serve you well.
    All the best,
    Matt

  • #13541

    Participant

    I don’t really connect that much with the negative state exercises. Although the time travel exercise was great. I prefer to be more focused on the positive. That being said, I did zero in on the time in my life when I probably formed some of these limiting beliefs so that was insightful. Still, I will use more the positive focus techniques.

  • #17425

    Participant

    Thanks for this post joyfulgirl, I assume you are talking about the 20 minute “releasing your limiting beliefs” bonus audio – this was the first guided meditation that really did not work for me at all. I made it about 10 minutes in. I was fully in the space of an awful memory, as guided, and it was just one too many times of “what does it feel like, what does it look like, what color is it, now once again, what does it feel like, how does it feel”. I stuck with the feeling – helpless dread/fear/panic, but after 10 full minutes of it I lost my temper and yelled at him through the computer to shut up and turned off the recording. Kinda laughing about it now, but imho, this is a risky meditation for anyone with physical or sexual abuse in their past. I think in modern parlance, this would get a “trigger warning” – 10+ full minutes of submersion in one of your worst memories is not something to take lightly!

  • #17456

    Participant

    Ditto what PeterPanda23 said. 10 minutes was all I could get through. I even tried fast forwarding a bit to see if I could pick it up later on in the meditation, but found it was not useful to me at all. One day out of 13 ain’t bad, though! On Sober Day 55, so all the days leading up to this one must be sinking in and “working.” Joyfulgirl, I hope you are getting lots out of the other days as well. Thanks for the honest and open post.

  • #19046

    Participant

    I also did not connect with this meditation. And Jack’s audible breathing and mouth sounds were extremely distracting. I didn’t get any insight as to a “moment” in time that caused my current feeling of being stuck. I think it takes more than a short meditation to work through that. I lasted 3/4 of it and went in to something more useful.

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