Today Felt Hard

This topic contains 3 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by

 
Participant
5 months, 3 weeks ago.

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  • #58279

    Participant

    I have made it 8 days in and I feel very proud of myself, but honestly, I thought by today that I would be feeling better emotionally. I am thinking about alcohol all the time, which is not even rational for me because I am not really a drinker during the week. Now all of a sudden it is just on my mind all the time. I honestly think it is because I am feeling very alone in this whole experience. My husband is a pretty heavy drinker and he can barely wrap his head around the fact that I am not drinking right now. I come from a family of heavy drinkers, my friends all drink a great deal. I thought by today that I would be feeling better but I am just feeling sad about it all. The willpower talk was helpful because even though I have been faithfully doing all the exercises and journaling, by today I felt like I was only tapping into my willpower to get through, which will not work in the long run. I am terrified of slipping up. I am rambling, thanks anyone who reads this for listening! I am having decision fatigue and I am going to get a good nights sleep 🙂

  • #121287

    Participant

    Don’t know if you’re still out there. I’m so sorry to hear of your struggle

    • #121292

      Participant

      Hi Beck67, I’m still here! Wow, it was weird getting a post from this site, and going back and reading this old post. I am happy to say that yesterday was my day 200. I have gone over 6 months with no alcohol, and it is hard for me to believe sometimes. I faithfully finished this program, then went onto to Annie Grace’s program. I never stopped journaling, I journal almost every day and I truly believe it is what has saved me. The whole experience has not been easy and I have had ups and downs with family but I am happy to be here and not back on day 8. I hope all is well with you, will you let me know? Heather

      • #121327

        Participant

        Hi Heather this is the first time I’ve ever posted but feel like I need the support that the forums offer. I started the programme a couple of months ago but relapsed on day 14 and basically haven’t had an afd since. My desire to drink is getting worse and have now made the 100 percent commitment to start the programme again. Today is going is my day1. I know how great I felt while being sober for that couple of weeks although I did have a couple of challenging days, just don’t really know why I relapsed and why I didn’t just pick myself up and keep going. Anyhow here I am so let’s just bring it on!!!
        Thanks for listening

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